Personal Development

How Your Beliefs Can Help You Accomplish Your Goals Faster

In this article, I’m going to explain how our belief system can help us accomplish our goals faster once we become conscious of it. Before you read this post, I suggest you read my first article on beliefs titled “Are your beliefs serving you or holding you back”. Now let’s get started, picture a goal that you’ve for yourself, maybe a goal of losing some weight, to earn certain amount of money, to complete a particular project; whatever your goal is, just get one in mind right now. I want to ask you; what do you honestly believed it will take you to achieve this goal? This is a goal you’ve already planned out how to achieve it. And answering this question is an easy one because you’ve your goal registered on your mind. For example, maybe your goal is you wanna lose weight and so what you believed to achieve this goal is, you’re going to change your diet, going to exercise a lot more. And once you changed your diet and adopt new exercise programs, and maintain a consistence level of discipline for a period of months then it will work out fine for u to accomplish your goal. So, that might be what you think or what you believe that will take you to achieve that goal. And if you honestly follow or do what you believe it will take to achieve your goal, you’ll probably succeed.

But what I want to talk about in this situation where you look at what you believe it will take you to achieve your goal and seriously over that you didn’t do it. What you believed to achieve your goal seems so difficult and requires too much work from you to do it. The first step or method I’m going to talk about in achieving your goal is working within a certain beliefs system. In other words, you’ve these beliefs about what it will take to achieve your goal, and that’s not necessary the same thing with it will objectively takes to achieve your goal. Because plan is not reality, you just hold such beliefs in your consciousness. Note, that the beliefs you hold doesn’t necessary mean your plan is the only way to achieve your goal, though your plans may work at times. But working on your plans and following the steps of your plans to achieve your goal, whether it’s a clearly documented plan or just kind of a basic idea of the steps you think you need to take. Working on that plan is working within a certain belief system. The belief system that led to the creation of that plans; in other words, is working within your belief, that’s what you believed it will take you to achieve that goal.

This is the common method of goal achievement which is mostly used by everyone. But If you make a plan based on what you believed it will take you to achieve your goal, you’re creating plans based on some objective matter of reality but you really not. Because sometimes our plans work with reality, sometimes it doesn’t. There is always some amount of imperfections in our understanding of reality depending on our level of consciousness. So, what you really do most often is creating plans based on your own mental matter not reality. The second method I want to share with you is to offer you an alternate way of achieving your goals.

The second method I want to talk about is working on your belief system itself. So, this means, instead of accepting your current mental state of what reality is, and the setting goals with that mental of reality, and then using that mental of reality to create the plans to achieve your goals. What I’m going to do here is to take a step back and look at the mental matter that you have and ask can I work on this matter itself to make my goals easier to achieve? Does that make sense? So, let’s use that weight matter again and in this case, you will say you wanna lose weight. Instead of working within your belief system about what it will take to lose weight, you’re going to work on your belief system itself. So what you really want to do here is to condition yourself to believe that you will reach your goal. And you don’t even need to be concern with how it will happen, because that’s working inside the belief system.

In this case, you’re working on the belief system, so you want to install the beliefs that you will definitely lose weight and reach the goal you’ve set for yourself. Now the way that this could work is for you try and install this belief system in yourself and condition yourself to reach your goal. Experience shows me that it appears to be some type of process in ourselves that will tend to make reality or our experience of reality congruence with our beliefs. In other words, our mental matter of reality is not merely our best guess observation of reality. It’s actually our best guess of creation of reality as well. It’s is an observation on one hand, but our mental matter of reality is also creating the paths to our goals. And this is creating how much success or failure we experience in our lives. Because of that creative aspect of our mental matter of reality, we need to take a greater degree of control over what’s actually creating. So, I think very few people realized that when you have belief about something, that belief is a creative entity.

Your beliefs about reality are not merely measuring reality and giving you feedback on reality. There are actually actively creating, and there are two mechanism that can occur. The first is through subconscious action. If you create a belief for example, that you’re going to lose weight and you’re absolutely certain that you’re going to lose weight, don’t you think that could potentially have effect an effects on your behavior? A behavior that could lead you to take the correct actions that will eventually cause you to lose weight. In fact, it will be far more easy to do it that way than to struggle against your belief system and fight with your beliefs. Because in your belief system the original one we talked about where you decided you need to have some restricted diet and do a lot of exercise and maintain some certain level of self discipline.

What you do is you’re really fighting your belief that says it’s hard to lose weight. And so you try to come up against that belief and fight with it. Instead, what I’m suggesting is an alternate approach for you to recondition that beliefs to get yourself believe that it’s going to be easy for you to lose weight. To get yourself believe you will succeed, they by conditioning your subconscious mind to take the correct actions. So that, when you’re thinking about what to eat you will become conscious of it. You’ll be often getting into the subconscious craving and you go and eat what pumps up in your head. Some foods will be pumping up in your head because you’ve an underlined belief that you’re going to succeed on your goal of losing weight.

Let’s take a step back and consider how you actually change this belief. We first of all realized that beliefs are choices and you can make these choices subconsciously or consciously. And thinking that you don’t have the power to change your beliefs is actually self beliefs of its own. If you think about it, is the one that keeps you trapped. Your belief that your mental matter of reality is accurate is actually part of your mental matter of reality. And in fact is the creative part not just part of the observing part. So the first door you’ve to go through in other to believe it is that there are other methods of goal achievement. But all you’ve to do is to consciously decide to drop those beliefs that unnecessary limit your options. And the beliefs that unnecessary limit your options will be called disempowering beliefs, and the ones that free you up and give you more options will be called empowering beliefs.

Empowering beliefs are simply more congruent with the way reality actually works. And a great congruency comes from recognizing that your mental matter of reality has creative effect on your experience of reality is not merely passive, it’s active. Now, the one method I mentioned is your subconscious process and through your subconscious action you’re creating results one way or another which maybe congruent with your mental matter of reality or incongruent with your mental matter of reality. And in the long run, we’re going to strive whether we like it or not for congruency with our mental matter of reality. We also strive for congruency with our beliefs.

The second mechanism is the possibility of super-conscious action, this means somehow, someway through some mechanisms your beliefs and thoughts about reality are going out to the universe and extending beyond your own subconscious mind, beyond your body, and they are imparting the world someway. And now, we can just think how this might happen. But one of the best way is simply to test, to see for yourself that they maybe something more to believe about reality and the way it manifest. This goes beyond your ability to explain it as merely subconscious action.

For example, when you set a goal for yourself and you’re convinced that it’s going to happen, you adopt a new belief, you change your mental matter of reality. From there, you may starts to see some synchronicity occur. You may starts to see strong coincidence within one or days after making these changes for yourself. Now, there’s certainly a possibility in your subconscious that you’ll begin to notice new things. However, I will suggest that if you actually adopt the beliefs that there is possibility of the super conscious action that works during your goal achievement, you have to open yourself up more to receive super-conscious help.

I found that the more I relaxed into that beliefs and say I wonder if there is super-conscious action. I wonder if there is a way for my beliefs to manifest, to go beyond my conscious ability to take direct actions or my subconscious ability to take indirect actions. And somehow my thoughts are affecting reality in some way. The more I did that, the more I saw evidence that, that was true for me. Now, on the other hand, you can say this is a self fulfilling prophecy or maybe I’m convincing myself that it’s true.  And that maybe the case, I have no real way of arguing that. But on the other hand, what if it works? If it works, it works. It doesn’t necessarily matter if you are slightly deluding yourself into believing that your goal are been manifest through super-conscious action. But yet, you’re getting the desired results you needed.

So, think this maybe an empowering belief whether or not it’s objectively or probably true. For now, I can’t see away it could be proven true or false. But I found that simply to believe in it. Simply to open myself up to it and you don’t have to blindly jumping with faith and accept that’s true. What I’m suggesting is that, you simply open yourself to the possibility of it. You allow it to be possible, and doing this maybe much easier than taking direct action within your current belief system. And everyone belief system have some degree of conflict that are incongruent with nature of reality. There may be internally incongruent or may be simply incongruent with reality. So allowing yourself the flexibility of by-passing those incongruence can sometimes allow your goals to manifest far more easily far more quickly  through a process of by-passing the blocks. By-passing those beliefs that will prevent your goal from manifesting easily.

For example, the weight lost goal, by-passing all the hard work that conscious efforts will do because you have a belief that are slightly in conflict. You believed you want to lose weight but you also believed that it’s going to be difficult to do or you want to make a certain amount of money, but you believed you would have to do something hard to make much amount of money. So, to get the blocks out of the way is something that can be achieved by opening yourself up to the potential for the subconscious and super-conscious action. How do you do this? Well, the way you will actually do this, is to choose a belief or to essentially hold an intention. What you’re doing is you’re creating an intention to achieve your goal. Many people know how to use intention in limited ways, such as intending to go to work, or intending to take off the trash. But intention can be much more powerful than that. You can create intentions that are much sounder, such as I intend to lose weight or I intend to attract a mate or simply I intend to be happy or I intend to feel good or I intend to be at peace.

And when you hold these intentions long enough they will eventually become beliefs. This will affect your subconscious actions. You’ll be acting congruently with what you. But then, we also talked about the possibility for synchronicity to occur through super- conscious action. I suggest that you experiment with this process and see how far you can develop it, at a very least it will help you by-pass those disempowering beliefs that are holding you back. And the best it can help you manifest your goal much more quickly. Adopt the beliefs such that you will become a self fulfilling prophecy for what you want. So, prophesize what you want to happen, and see it happening to you.

And the way you do this is actually very simple because you simply need to recognize that it’s a choice. When you realized that your mental matter of reality is at least imparting or creating your reality, then you’ve the potential to make choices that are very important to you. To install belief simply because you have that ability to create, for example, let’s say you want to make go make dinner for yourself. You don’t need special permission to be able to do this. It’s simply you decide to make dinner for yourself, you decide what you want to create, you decide what you want to have and you go do it. Just say I’m going to have this as a dinner, you make it. It’s the same process with beliefs except people make it more complicated. They think they don’t have this ability to do this when they really do.

So simple, state your goal, state it to the universe and say make it so. Simply say I believe I’m going to lose weight and I believe I’m going to make such amount to money or I believe I’m going to attract a mate into my life, and you tell the universe to make it so. So, what you’re really doing is changing your mental matter of reality by choice, by conscious choice. And of course you’ve to recognize that you have this ability that you can do this. So, if you can overcome your resistance to this process and simply try it with open mind, I think you will found a credible way of achieving your goals. And note that the action doesn’t conflict with the first method we talked about for achieving goals, the one you worked within your belief system. Just try your best to apply both and see how you reach your goals with each of them.

Until Next Time, Live Exceptionally!

How real Men Live their Lives to Influence Others

On every June of every year all over the world, we celebrate father’s day to mark and acknowledge the impacts of our fathers in our families and global development. We do this to encourage our fathers to do more in human capacity development and infrastructures to save humanity from collapsing. Our fathers set good figures that governed our families and entire world, and also make sure we follow through such figures to live exceptional life. Father’s Day is a celebration honoring fathers and celebrating fatherhood, paternal bonds and the influence of fathers in society.

Each family on their own also celebrates their fathers as the head of their family and their contributions towards the growth of their family. At the other hand, some men are not being celebrated during the father’s day because they aren’t worthy to be called Fathers. They give in to the forces of life, which make them to live a low life without contributing for the growth of their family and entire world respectively. Such men failed to take full responsibility for their family and also denied their children a good father figure while growing up.

Are you a real father to your family? What’s your impact in your family and in the entire world respectively? Are you a real man? How strong and committed are you in raising your children and giving great figure? Are you taking 100% full responsibility for your family? How do people see your impacts in your children up bringing? Is your family proud of you to be called their father? In this post I’m going to share ideas on how real men live their lives influence others. And it’s all start by answering the question; who is a real man?

What does it means to be a real man? How can men in our today’s world consciously express their masculinity to influence others positively? What’s the most kindness way for a man to live and express himself to others without being bias? How does real man live their lives? What does real men make priority in their daily life? What’s the dream of a real man? Below are my ideas on how real men live their lives to influence others:

Real Men Put God First

No matter how we claimed to be busy in our daily activities and endeavors, a real man always put God first in whatever he’s doing in life. He knows that his source is always from God, and once he’s in good relationship with God all his needs would be taken care of. A real man stands are a source of power to his family because he grounded himself with God’s purpose for his life. He makes sure his family developed strong relationship with their creator. He supports his family spiritually, and teaches them the way of God and how to please Him. A real man talk to God about his family in prayers and ask God for divine guidance and provisions for his family. He honor God with his money, by supporting the work of God, Supporting Charity Organizations, Giving to less privilege people, and other services that support helping others.    

Real Men Put their Relationships Second

After putting God first, a real man put his relationship with others second to enable him think like a freeman and make adjustment whenever it’s necessary. Life will test a man to see if he’s willing to put loyalty to others ahead of own principles. A real man will be offered many temptations by nature to expose all his true loyalties, either tom himself, family and others. A real man’s greatest reward is to live with integrity, purpose, passion, vision, big dreams, and his greatest punishment is what he inflicts upon himself for placing anything above his integrity. Whenever a real man scarifies his integrity, he loses his freedom as a free thinker.

A real man knows he must commit to his family by taking full responsibility that comes with greater challenge of raising his family. He knows that when he gives up to his duty as a man or fails to take full responsibility of his family, he becomes something less than a real man. When others observe that a real man is strongly committed to his values and ideas, he gains their trust and respect, though some of these trust and respect doesn’t come directly to him, but people think and see him as the real man. And the surest way for any man to lose respect and trust from others, as well as himself, is when he violates his own values, principles and rules.

Real Men Tries New Things Always

No matter how we tried to put this off or deny it, a real man always try new approach of getting things done. He keeps opening himself to new ideas, learning things on a daily basis to sharpen his skills and talents. A real man is always will to make mistakes. He’s willing and ready to be wrong at times. He would rather try and fail than to do nothing at all.

A real man’s self-trust is one of his greatest and profound assets to continued being who he is. Whenever he doubts himself by worrying so long on his past failures, he diminishes himself and brings himself down to nothing. A real man considers the prospect of his failures, but he doesn’t put himself with pointless worries about it. He accepts that if a failure outcome occurs during his journey to success, he can possibly deal with it because he knows that life a mixed up with ups and downs. A real man grow more often through his daily failures than he does from his success. He knows that temporary success cannot test his resolve in the way that failures can. He knows that success has its challenges, but a real man learns more about himself when he takes more risks and absolves challenges as part of the game.

Real Men Make Real Decisions

When it comes to decisions making, a real man don’t wait for anybody before they could take positive decisions that will influence their lives positively. A real man understands and respects the power of choice and makes best ones for himself always. A real man lives a life of his own creation by focusing passionately making real decisions that will save his future unlike ordinary man that lives based on other people’s decisions. He knows that life stagnates when he fails to decide for himself to enable him flourishes on a clear path he chooses.

When a real man makes a decision, he opens the door he wants and closes the doors he doesn’t want. He back off to things that won’t support him in getting close to his destinations. He chooses his friends and associates consciously. He knew he can grow, remain, or fall by the decisions he makes daily, and then he thrive to make real ones that will guarantee living an exceptional life.

Real Men Keeps Open and Honest Relationship

A real accepts 100% full responsibility for his relationships by consciously choosing his friends, lovers, and associates. He actively expresses his love openly and honestly to create genuine connections with others. He actively seeks out to establish some companies of people who inspires, motivates, as well as challenged him to live an exceptional life. He’s always willing to sheds and blocks those who hold him back in life.

A real man doesn’t blame others for his relationship problems. When his relationship is no longer compatible, he initiates a repair process and gives his partner room to make their own decisions. He is always open for adjustment to accommodate others with his values and rules. A real man holds himself accountable for the outcome of the relationship he allows into his life. Also he holds others accountable for their behavior, but holds himself accountable for tolerating such behaviors from others. He teaches others how to treat him by the relationship he’s willing to allow into his life. He refuses to fill his life with negative or destructive relationship that could have negative impacts on him in the future.

Real Men Are Confident on Themselves

A real man always speaks and acts confidently in the real world. He owns his attitude, character, behavior and respects. A real man doesn’t adopt a confident posture of others because he knows he will succeed once he’s committed with his goals. He often knows that failure is a likely outcome sometimes and see it as a teaching tools. Even when everyone is against him, he’s always confident in himself to push on and get things down as required from his standards and values. He build his courage and persistence as set them as his strong allies to rely on whenever he has nobody to help him.

A real man is willing to accept defeat from the real world because he knows that for him to reach his goals, he must pass through tough times and huddles to get to where is going. He’s willing to acknowledge the ups and downs beyond his control from the real world. But he refuses to be overwhelmed by his own self-doubt. He knows that when he stops trusting himself, he’s surely going lost out from the game of life. He always surrenders to fate when necessary, but won’t surrender to his fears.

Real Men Re-channel Their Sex Energy

A real man is careful not to allow his sexual energy to get him stuck at the level of lost. He re-channels much of his sexual energy into his heart and head, where it can serve him higher values instead of just his selfish desire to have sex always. A real man doesn’t hide his sexuality power, rather he re-channel it to his talents and passion. If others shrink from him because he’s energy, he allows them to have their ways. He believes there’s no need for him to lower his energy just to avoid some people. He accepts the consequences of being male; he makes no apologies for his nature. A re-channeled sexual energy pushed a real man to pursuits his heart-centered dreams. He feels such energy pulsing within him, driving him to action. He feels uncomfortable standing still without being motivated and inspired from within. He allows his sexual energy to explode through his heart, not just his genitals.

Real Men Faces their Fears Consciously

A real man makes peace with his fears. He makes friends who like taking risks to bring down their fears to nothing. He doesn’t hide or run away from tests his fears. Rather he turns toward them and engages them boldly to overcome them.  A real man knows his called to be tested with his fears in the real world. Whenever he hides from his fears, he consciously knows he’s falling out alignment with his true self. He feels weak, depressed, and helpless. No matter how hard he tries to comfort himself to achieve a state of peace, he cannot overcome his inner feelings of dread. A real man knows only when facing his fears will he experience peace.

A real man succeeds or fails whenever he tries to overcome his fears. He feels like a real man whenever he faces the right way, staring straight his fears. He feels even more like a man when he advances in the direction of his fears, as if sailing on the winds of an inner scream.

Real Men Expresses Love Actively, Not Passively

A real man is an active giver of love and affections, not a passive receiver of it. He is the first to initiate a conversation, the first to ask for what’s needed, and the first to say “I love you”. He doesn’t wait for someone else to take the lead of expressing love, he just do it. He knows that the universe doesn’t respond positively to hesitation, rather to active givers. He knows that now is the only moment to express his love actively to others, and does that without feeling guilty of doing so.

A real man knows he’s a source of energy to those around him and it’s his job, his duty to share his love energy with the world. He must allow the love energy to flow from the source with God, through him as a person, and into the world. He assumes this role and has no doubt he is for sure living an exceptional life.

Real Men Die Well

A real man always give his best to the world while his still alive, and such service to mankind allow him to make peace with death whenever it’s at his door. A real man is not afraid of death because he knows that one day each of us will leave this planet earth. Rather he sees life as an adventure that would come to an end one day. A real man greatest challenge in life is to develop his inner strength that would enable him expresses his true self while on planet earth. He’s willing to share his love, ideas, wisdom, passion, purpose etc. with the world without holding back. Whenever he’s satisfied by his contributions to mankind, he would peacefully make peace with death and be ready to die whenever death meets him. But if didn’t live well from his childhood to old age, he then see death as an enemy and becomes afraid of it all the days of his life.

A man can not die well unless he lived well. A real man lives well when he accepts his mortality and draws strength from knowing that his physical existence is temporary. When he faces and accepts the inevitability of death; when he learns to see death as his ally instead of his enemy… he’s finally able to express his true self. So a man is not ready to live well as a real man as he accepts that’s already dead but just as a matter of time and conditions.

This article was based on my own personal research and opinion; I strongly believed that there are many other qualities real men possess which I didn’t write in the post. I will be open to learn from you if you have other qualities of real men you many like to share with the world. If the article got you inspired and you think someone out there can learn from it, please kindly, click the share button to share the post to social medias to enable others follow the link and read the article. Also, you can support the development of this website by a free will Donations to enable me serve you better if you’re touched within to do so. Kindly, click the Donations button to support me as I research and share with the world freely. Together we can make the world a better place through Self Education.

Until Next Time, Live Exceptionally!

Exploring The Art of Boldness to Live Exceptional Life

“You’ll learn, as you get older, that rules are made to be broken. Be bold enough to live life on your terms, and never, ever apologize for it. Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path. Laugh in the face of adversity, and leap before you look. Dance as though EVERYBODY is watching. March to the beat of your own drummer. And stubbornly refuse to fit in.” ― Mandy Hale

 Life is just life until you explore the art of boldness to go for or become whatever you desire for yourself in life. We were all created with no idea of whom we will become in the future years as we grow up to adulthood, but only our level of boldness that often pushed us to take some risks to reshape our life. The simple truth about life is that, you can live a default life with default results or decide to live exceptionally by exploring the art of boldness to design your life and have abundance in every aspect of your life.

Ask yourself what you truly want in life. Do you want a loving marriage, the respect of your children? Do you want plenty of money, exotic cars, a thriving business, a mansion? Do you want to travel whole world, see historical landmarks? Do you to be idolized by millions as a big time musician, or as a celebrity on your chosen career path? Do you want to leave your mark for posterity as inventor of new technologies? Do you work with NGOs, to save the world or take a proactive role in making a measurable impact in our environment?

Whatever you desire or crave for in life, perhaps you should ask yourself, am I bold enough to really go for what I want from life? Most of us, when we see someone with extraordinary capability or someone who seems to have a superhuman capability to deal with life’s challenges. We tagged them with following; they are lucky. They are more talented than us. They must have been that way. But in reality, human brain has the capacity to produce answers faster than the smartest computer on ever produced. We gave our power away because we lack boldness to explore and develop our brain attract what we want from ourselves. We’re always afraid to ask for a raise in our place of work. We’re always afraid of asking someone for a date because of lack of boldness to do so.

“I want to take my rightful share of life by force, I want to give lavishly, I want love to flow from my heart, to ripen and bear fruit. There are many horizons that must be visited, fruit that must be plucked, books read, and white pages in the scrolls of life to be inscribed with vivid sentences in a bold hand.” 
Tayeb Salih

The art of boldness is the opposite of fearfulness. To be bold means a willingness to get things done despite risks. Boldness may be a property that only certain individuals are able to display. For example, in the context of sociability, a bold person may be willing to risk shame or rejection in social situations, or to bend rules of etiquettes or politeness. An excessively bold person could aggressively ask for money, or persistently push someone to fulfill a request. Exploring the art of boldness gives you the ability to control or reject unnecessary or harmful impulses that might have you been holding you back to live an exceptional life. It’s the ability to arrive to a decision and follow it with perseverance until its successful accomplishment. It’s the inner power that overcomes the desire to indulge in unnecessary and useless habits, and inner strength that overcomes inner emotional and mental resistance for taking action. It’s also one of the corner stones of success, both spiritual and material.

Those who act boldly are recognizing both a fundamental right as well as the arts of reality to live an exceptional life. People, who have accomplished much in our society, are men and women with a spirit of boldness and adventure respectively. They are those who are willing to challenge and constantly question even the existence of their comfort zone. They try new ideas, and are willing to attempt the seemingly impossible to live an exceptional life. Our toady’s celebrities and the top politicians reach the upper echelon of success because they acted boldly on their daily goals to accomplish their dreams. They thrive under pressure and take calculated risks and actions that weak people are just too afraid to attempt.

Art of boldness simply means an act of responding to a situation in a manner that may be viewed as daring to some, but is essential to effectively address the issue at hand. By boldness, I do not mean being rude, reckless, insensitive, or arrogant.  None of these attributes to art of boldness, because boldness is all about gathering enough momentum to get things done.

There is no more liberating, no more exhilarating experience than to determine one’s position, state it bravely, and then to act boldly. Boldness is a spirit word that eloquently describes bravery. It takes a great deal of boldness to confront and tackle the issues in today’s society with a straight forward approach. Boldness can’t be inherited, but it’s a characteristic that will blossom with the determination you have to live an exceptional life. Boldness comes when you begin to make valued decisions and move forward for what you want and believe in. By challenging your personal growth experience and creating goals you’re bringing clarity to your dreams and energy that will revitalize your mind, body and spirit.

Whenever you’re facing a decision to act boldly, consider it as an opportunity to prove your worth. The thing you must do is decide whether you want to take action or not. This is where the spirit of boldness comes into play. Any action you take is an opportunity to improve yourself, to advance you a lot in life and achieve personal success. Don’t let an opportunity pass in your life, and don’t you dare allow fear to be your scape goat.

You can tag it or call it anything you want, but developing or cultivating art of boldness, audacity or even courage is no accident nor is it an easy task in life. It takes guts, energy, courage, and effort. In fact, training yourself to act boldly usually requires a lot sweat, hard work and tears over many years of practice. The best way to train yourself is the same you train muscles; you must practice, practice, and practice! Because the surest way to get comfortable  with high performance and live exceptional life is by telling yourself , this needs to be done, and I’m going to get it done, and I’m going to get it done at all cost.

Art of boldness is the ability to dare to do those difficult things ordinary people fear to do. It means standing out from the crowd. You must always explore the art of boldness to succeed and aggressive in each act, seizing every opportunity to move forward and improve at all cost to live an exceptional life. In your boldness, make sure you always compete fairly with yourself and never try to win in every game you place. Try to be fair and learn from your failures and use it to strengthen your inner self.

“It was a pleasure to deal with a man of high ideals, who scorned everything mean and base, and who possessed those robust and hardy qualities of body and mind, for the lack of which no merely negative virtue can ever atone.” 
Theodore Roosevelt

When you have an attractive personality you developed through the art of boldness, you will get almost anyone to behave towards you exactly as you wish. Going extra mile by exploring the art of boldness in your everyday life is just a way of writing yourself an insurance policy against the fear of poverty, against the fear of want, and against competition from those who only go halfway in life. Remember, your best recommendation is the one you give yourself by exploring the art of boldness to live an exceptional life by providing superior service in the right mental attitude. The knowledgeable person who has the right answers is the one who will impress the powerful people. So, get boldness, smartness and dare to win.

Life is the best teacher of all. Most of the time, life does not talk to you, rather it pushed you to act boldly to move out of your comfort zone. It just some sort of pushes you around often, and each push is life saying, wake up, there is something I want you to learn about yourself. If you explore the art of boldness to learn life’s lesson, you will do well and live exceptionally. If you didn’t act boldly to learn life’s lessons, life will just continue to push you around. Why not act boldly today? Also, if you’re prepared to be flexible, keep an open mind and learn how to act boldly, you will grow and improve a lot on your quest to live an exceptional life.

There is nothing more important than learning the art of boldness in life and keeping your mind focused upon the tasks, things, conditions and circumstances you really want for yourself. Understating the way in which you can maintain a sound mind and body depends, therefore, on understanding the way nature works whenever you’re courageous enough to explore the art of boldness. You must learn to work with natural forces, not to fight them, because art of boldness is one of them that’s installed in you from birth.  Don’t let your past failures to get you down. You’re stronger and bolder than you ever think you are; just give yourself the opportunity and approval to explore the art of boldness in you to live an exceptional life. for additional resource on how to explore the art of boldness to live Exceptional life, read my article titled Courage to Live Exceptional Life.  

Until Next Time, Live Exceptionally!

Raising Your Standards to Live Exceptional Life

If you don’t set baseline standards for what you’ll accept in your life, you’ll find it easy to slip into behaviors and attitudes and a quality of life that’s far below what you deserve.” Tony Robbins

Raising our standards is one of the conscious decisions we can only make whenever we want more from life, either to pursue our lives purpose or to achieve our personal goals to live an exceptional life. We can grow ourselves to become more in life, remain at our current state, or fall back to low life; all depends on the standards we set for ourselves. Our standards set our values, and our values define who we are. Our lives reflections and how people see us in the real world can only be measured by the quality of our standards.  

We are all born equals, but what separate us from each other are the quality of the standards we set for ourselves, either consciously or unconsciously. Different people have different standards and values, the differences are based on either high or low standards. From our professions, to our appearances, our relationships, our finances, our spirituality, our beliefs systems, all are governed by the standards we hold on each of them at any particular period of time. Most often, our standards are set by default, that is, from what we learned from our environment or doctrines from religions and our families.

“We only get what we believe that we deserve. Raise the bar, raise your standards and you will receive a better outcome.” — Joel Brown

People have an endless list of things they believe they should do or should follow through on. And these “shoulds” carry about the same weight as a New Year’s resolution — that is, if it happens, then that’s exciting. But if not, it won’t be too disappointing because you kind of knew it wasn’t really going to happen anyway.

But what happens when you decide something is an absolute “must?” What happens when you cut off any other possibility than you succeeding — when you decide that you are either going to find a way to make something happen or you’ll create the way yourself?

When you raise your standards and turn “should” into “must,” you are making an inner shift to take control over the quality of your life. Any area you are not getting what you want is because you haven’t raised your standards.

“Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.” — Mandy Hale

Any time I sincerely want to a change or move to another stage of life, the first thing I often do is to raise my standards. Then I move straight to consciously visualize my current standards to know things that are no longer important to me, and then set some new standards that will help me move to the next level. I do make new demand for myself to see beyond my current standards and think in years, like 5 to 10 years from today, what kind of person am I going to become? How would people will be thinking about me in terms of contributions or helping them live an exceptional life? What am I go to stop doing, do more or start doing that will help me reach my new set standards?

Raising my standards often be like, stating clearly for myself things I would no longer tolerate or accept in my life, all the things that I aspired to become as I moved on to the new version of me. Probably, all my “shoulds”, “don’ts”, “woulds”, “does”,”dos”, “wills”, and “haves”, etc are consciously written down. It “could” be to loss some pounds of weight through exercising or dieting. “Should” get more confident. “Will” earn more money to support my new goals. “Do” more of reading and meditation. “Won’t” go for a date for some weeks. “Have” more time for myself or relationship. All these will make up my new standards as I’m consciously moving forward to the new person I set to become.

“Raising your standards is not about being the best among others. It’s about having a healthy level of self-respect”— Uche Mba

Comparing myself with other people’s standards is just a waste of time, because what I feels and wishes for myself can never be the same with theirs. If I compared myself with people that I’m much better than; it would make me feel or look like a king or superior to them. Or if I compared myself with those who are doing much better than me; it would make me feel like I’m not striving like them. Doing that won’t make any long lasting change in my consciousness; rather it would make me feel like I’m in competitions with others.

 The only best and most accurate question to ask myself when raising my standards is this; am I doing my best with the recourses I have within me currently? If the answer is yes, I have nothing to regret or ashamed of, no matter how other people will view my results. For many years, I suffered from low self esteem and feelings of not having confidence on myself. Talking to strangers was a big challenge to me back then. In my University’s days I couldn’t date or have stable relationship during my undergraduate programs. All these happened to me because I was living on a low level standards. We all have been there.

But after 8 years of conscious personal development and try and errors experiences I went through, my standards are much higher and better off now.  I’ve made tremendous progress, and in some areas of my life it’s fair to say my results easily fall into the top 1%.  This website you’re reading now is among the top 21% in terms  of personal development and lifestyle goal I set for myself. My personal relationship with others have improved tremendously. I can now easily initiate conversations with strangers. Probably, ask for a date if I think it’s necessary with any lady I found attractive.  And I’ve certainly read more books than 99% of my age mates. But I don’t set my standards by the habits of others. That isn’t what I need to grow, and it isn’t what you need either.

As I move forward on the path of growth, there are always periods where I slide a bit in one area while my focus is elsewhere, but the long-term trend is to continue raising my standards without limit.  I want my best to continue getting better.  I always have my eye on the next step.

Just make some list of things you would no longer tolerate or accept, that’s where it starts. Raising your standards required that you started noticing things that were previously below your level of awareness.  You have to first become aware of what you needed to change.  For example, if you discover you are not happy and fulfilled in your current relationship or job. Why are you still there? How long would you be in place where you are not happy about?  What’s holding you back from raising your standards? Are you aware that your current standards won’t change your lifestyle that much? Now ask yourself what if you succeed if you then raise your standards to experience new things in your life? You don’t have to compare yourself with anyone, only your feelings would tell you if your current standards are still needful to you or they need to be changed.

“Let your actions prove that you’re committed to living life on a new level. Get rid of the people and thoughts that confine you to an average existence. Raise your standards and aim for greatness.” — Tony Robbins

What if am to ask you, “Are you doing your best?” and you honestly answer, “No, I’m not?”  Then you’ve got some problems. But don’t feel bad at yourself, I’ve been there to. Just know you have unused potential that you’re just wasting because you aren’t conscious of your standards. You’re living below your capacity.  Probably this is because you’ve defined your current standards based on what you see in other people or what you watched TV like (ZEEWORLD African magic and other stuffs like that).  If you’re among the intelligent people reading this blog, it’s fair to say your standards for living are already well above average.  Who cares?  You’ll get no gifts from me reading my post but I’m only opening your eyes to see beyond your imaginations things you never thought you could learn from me. Is that the best you can do?  Surely you’re capable of outperforming or becoming who you are at the moment.  What other people are doing is irrelevant.  You know you’re capable of more, so step up and claim those results.  If you don’t want that excess capacity for yourself, then do as I’m doing and give it away to the world.  Use it to make a difference in someone else’s life.  Help other people who are average or below average reach the level you’ve achieved.  There are people in the world who would give almost anything to have what you take for granted as normal.  Why not help some of them?

As individuals we’re capable of becoming more of what we are today, each of us in our own unique way can achieve more if we can raise our standards to live an exceptional life.  We can do this by discovering our strengths and developing them to the level of genius; contributing by serving the highest good of all in making the world a better place to live in.  We move forward in life by raising our standards consciously each day because through our standards a new us to be born into this world. Think about the consequence of those men and woman who raised their standards in different professions or careers of their choices and note their achievements in that field. That same power which was available to them is still available for you, only if you have the courage to claim your power to live exceptionally today. Also note that changing an organization, a company, a country or changing the world begins with the simple steps of raising one’s standards to live an exceptional life. You too can do it.   

 Sometimes, if you’re following this path, you may hear some strange warning or side talks from people around you. Please don’t let the warnings get into your head. Ignore it.  The new path isn’t for them, but for you.  All you need to do is look around the world and see where the new path is taking you, and then rejoice because you’re on the right track.  In order to make some difference in the world, you must move beyond what’s normal and do some extra ordinary stuff to live an exceptional life. Raising your standards should be your life goals, and living below your standards should never be a choice if you dare to live an exceptional life. If this article got you motivated, please kindly click share button below to share it to any social media of your choice. Note, “a candle losses nothing by lightning another candle”.  For additional articles to raise your standards read my post tilted Don’t Disqualify Yourself, Try First

I know I can do better in my relationships with others, spirituality, finances, behaviors, career path, character development, service to humanity, and I will.  And I know you can do better too.  Now will you do it? 

Until Next Time, Live Exceptionally!

Courage to Live Exceptional Life

Most people have limited themselves to a certain level of life below average because of fear and lack of courage to stand out from the crowd. Some have given up their dreams and passion because they never believed that their own dreams and visions are achievable.  Out of fears and ignorance, most people have given in and sale out their dreams and visions because they lack the courage to go after them.

When you look at the person you’ve become these few years back and the kind of person you dreamed about when you were younger, does your current personality align with that person you dreamt of becoming at your younger age? Are you close to that personality you dreamt about at your early stage of life or you’ve chosen a different life style with a different dreams altogether? Have you given up on dreams because of fears? Are you afraid of getting started with your dreams, or you’ve built your courage to embrace that person you dreamed of becoming?

In our day to day life, we don’t give much attention to the word courage. We all believed that courage is designed for particular set of people; like the Soldiers, Air force, fire fighters, activist, etc. Security is what matters most today. Perhaps you were taught to avoid being too bold or too brave. It’s too dangerous. Don’t take unnecessary risks. Don’t draw attention to yourself in public. Follow family traditions. Don’t talk to strangers. Keep an eye out for suspicious people. Stay safe.

But a side effect of overemphasizing the importance of personal security in your life is that it can cause you to live reactively. Instead of setting your own goals, making plans to achieve them, and going after them with gusto, you play it safe. Keep working at the stable job, even though it doesn’t fulfill you. Remain in the unsatisfying relationship, even though you feel dead inside compared to the passion you once had. Who are you to think that you can buck the system? Accept your lot in life, and make the best of it. Go with the flow, and don’t rock the boat. Your only hope is that the currents of life will pull you in a favorable direction.

No doubt there exist real dangers in life you must avoid. But there’s a huge gulf between recklessness and courage. I’m not referring to the heroic courage required to risk your life to save someone from a burning building. By courage I mean the ability to face down those imaginary fears and reclaim the far more powerful life that you’ve denied yourself. Fear of failure. Fear of rejection. Fear of going broke. Fear of being alone. Fear of humiliation. Fear of public speaking. Fear of being ostracized by family and friends. Fear of physical discomfort. Fear of regret. Fear of success.

How many of these fears are holding you back? How would you live if you had no fear at all? You’d still have your intelligence and common sense to safely navigate around any real dangers, but without feeling the emotion of fear, would you be more willing to take risks, especially when the worst case wouldn’t actually hurt you at all? Would you speak up more often, talk to more strangers, ask for more sales, and dive headlong into those ambitious projects you’ve been dreaming about? What if you even learned to enjoy the things you currently fear? What kind of difference would that make in your life?

Have you previously convinced yourself that you aren’t really afraid of anything… that there are always good and logical reasons why you don’t do certain things? It would be rude to introduce yourself to a stranger. You shouldn’t attempt public speaking because you don’t have anything to say. Asking for a raise would be improper because you’re supposed to wait until the next formal review. They’re just rationalizations though – think about how your life would change if you could confidently and courageously do these things with no fear at all.

Could you just remember that particular moment you looked at yourself in a mirror and picked up the courage to explore the real potential in you to break even? How does it make you feel doing those things you haven’t done before? For example, the day you asked for a raise in salary or wage at the place of your work? How your relationship turned out perfectly cute, the day you courageously asked your partner for a date?

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, “I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
– Eleanor Roosevelt

What is Courage?

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.
– Ambrose Redmoon.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.
– Mark Twain.

Courage is the ability to do something difficult even when there’s risk. Courageous people do and say what they think is right despite opposition. The more you learn to act in spite of fear, the more human you become. The more you follow the fear, the more you live like a lower mammal. So the question, “Are you a man or a mouse?” is consistent with human neurology. Men take actions, mouse neglect responsibility and blame others. So, which one are you, Man or Mouse?

We build courage as we grow consciously each day by taking actions and full responsibilities for our challenges. Courage is an important asset for those who desired to live exceptional life. It gives them the confidence to be themselves, risk their own social status to stand up for others, and share their work even in the face of criticism. Those whose heart is willing to stand out and live a exceptional life like to take bold action to test their courage; though they take it gradually to grow consciously during the process.

Courageous people are still afraid, but they don’t let the fear paralyze them. People who lack courage will give into fear more often than not, which actually has the long-term effect of strengthening the fear. When you avoid facing a fear and then feel relieved that you escaped it, this acts as a psychological reward that reinforces the mouse-like avoidance behavior, making you even more likely to avoid facing the fear in the future. So the more you avoid asking someone out on a date, the more paralyzed you’ll feel about taking such actions in the future. You are literally conditioning yourself to become more timid and mouse-like.

Such avoidance behavior causes stagnation in the long run. As you get older, you reinforce your fear reactions to the point where it’s hard to even imagine yourself standing up to your fears. You begin taking your fears for granted; they become real to you. You cocoon yourself into a life that insulates you from all these fears: a stable but unhappy marriage, a job that doesn’t require you to take risks, an income that keeps you comfortable. Then you rationalize your behavior: You have a family to support and can’t take risks, you’re too old to shift careers, you can’t lose weight because you have “fat” genes. Five years… ten years… twenty years pass, and you realize that your life hasn’t changed all that much. You’ve settled down. All that’s really left now is to live out the remainder of your years as contently as possible and then settle yourself into the ground, where you’ll finally achieve total safety and security.

But there’s something else going on behind the scenes, isn’t there? That tiny voice in the back of your mind recalls that this isn’t the kind of life you wanted to live. It wants more, much more. It wants you to become far wealthier, to have an outstanding relationship, to get your body in peak physical condition, to learn new skills, to travel the world, to have lots of wonderful friends, to help people in need, to make a meaningful difference. That voice tells you that settling into a job where you sell widgets the rest of your life just won’t cut it. That voice frowns at you when you catch a glance of your oversized belly in the mirror or get winded going up a flight of stairs. It beams disappointment when it sees what’s become of your family. It tells you that the reason you have trouble motivating yourself is that you aren’t doing what you really ought to be doing with your life… because you’re afraid. And if you refuse to listen, it will always be there, nagging you about your mediocre results until you die, full of regrets for what might have been.

So how do you respond to this ornery voice that won’t shut up? What do you do when confronted by that gut feeling that something just isn’t right in your life? What’s your favorite way to silence it? Maybe drown it out by watching TV, listening to the radio, working long hours at an unfulfilling job, or consuming alcohol and caffeine and sugar.

But whenever you do this, you lower your level of consciousness. You sink closer towards an instinctive animal and move away from becoming a fully conscious human being. You react to life instead of proactively going after your goals. You fall into a state of learned helplessness, where you begin to believe that your goals are no longer possible or practical for you. You become more and more like a mouse, even trying to convince yourself that life as a mouse might not be so bad after all, since everyone around you seems to be OK with it. You surround yourself with your fellow mice, and on the rare occasions that you encounter a fully conscious human being, it scares the hell out of you to remember how much of your own courage has been lost.

Most people are too weak, and simply give into fear. It is hard when you have been conditioned your whole life to stay safe and stay out of harms way of doing things. While this makes sense when you are crossing the street, it doesn’t make any sense in your career and self-development. You have to take the lead, and make your life whatever you ever dreamed about it. Don’t just wait for the perfect moment, try something new today. Speak up. Go for it. Live up Stronger.

If no one took risks, we would all be on the same page. We wouldn’t evolve either. You can’t get better if you don’t take risk. You stay the same, or even worse, you move backwards into a more self-conscious hole of security that doesn’t have room for opportunity to grow. The courage to live exceptional life involves recognizing fear, learning about what fear is and how it affects you, then consciously working to eliminate it.

It is not an easy process, but it is certainly doable. If it was easy, there would be no fear in the world, and we would all be successful. That is not the case, because we value security over risk way too much as a society.

As an individual, you have the choice to take risk. It is your life; you get to do whatever the hell you want with it. Don’t let anyone hold you back and don’t let any limiting beliefs hold you back. Once you can let go of all fear and worry, you create channels of opportunity to grow as a conscious human being.

The way to embrace your future and live exceptional life is to summon your courage and confront that inner voice that had be telling you raise your standard and live your dreams. Find a place where you can be alone with pen and paper. Listen to that voice, and face up to what it’s telling you, no matter how difficult it is to hear. This voice may tell you that your marriage has been dead for ten years, and you’re refusing to face it because you’re afraid of divorce. It may tell you that you’re afraid that if you start your own business, you’ll probably fail, and that’s why you’re staying at a job that doesn’t challenge you to grow. It may tell you that you’ve given up trying to lose weight because you’ve failed at it so many times, and you’re addicted to food. It may tell you that the friends you’re hanging out with now are incongruent with the person you want to be, and that you need to leave that reference group behind and build a new one. It may tell you that you always wanted to be an actor or writer, but you settled for a sales job because it seemed more safe and secure. It may tell you that you always wanted to help people in need, but you aren’t doing so in the way you should. It may tell you that you’re wasting your talents.

See if you can reduce that voice to just a single word or two. What is it telling you to do? Leave. Quit. Speak. Write. Dance. Act, Exercise, Sell, Switch, Move on, Let go, Ask, Learn, Forgive etc. Whatever you get from this, write it down. Perhaps you even have different words for each area of your life.

Now you have to take the difficult step of consciously acknowledging that this is what you really want. It’s OK if you don’t think it’s possible for you. It’s OK if you don’t see how you could ever have it. But don’t deny that you want it. You lower your consciousness when you do that. When you look at your overweight body, admit that you really want to be fit and healthy. When you light up that next cigarette, don’t deny that you want to be a nonsmoker. When you meet the potential mate of your dreams, don’t deny that you would love to be in a relationship with that person. When you meet a person who seems to be at total peace with herself, don’t deny that you crave that level of inner peace too. Get yourself out of denial. Move instead to a place where you admit, “I really do want this, but I just don’t feel I currently have the ability to get it.” It’s perfectly OK to want something that you don’t think you can have. And you’re almost certainly wrong in concluding that you can’t have it. But first, stop lying to yourself and pretending you don’t really want it.

Move From Fear to Action, Even if You Expect to Fail

When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up our minds to walk boldly through them.
– Orison Swett Marden

Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman, before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air.
– John Quincy Adams

Now that you’ve acknowledged some things you’ve been afraid to face, how do you feel? You probably still feel paralyzed against taking action. That’s okay. While diving right in and confronting a fear head-on can be very effective, that may require more courage than you feel you can summon right now.

Courage, however, doesn’t require that you take drastic action in these situations. Courage is a learned mental skill that you must condition, just as weight training strengthens your muscles. You wouldn’t go into a gym for the first time and try to lift 300 pounds, so don’t think that to be courageous you must tackle your most paralyzing fear right away.

There are two methods I will suggest for building courage. The first approach is analogous to progressive weight training. Start with weights you can lift but which are challenging for you, and then progressively train up to heavier and heavier weights as you grow stronger. So tackle your smallest fears first, and progressively train up to bigger and bigger fears. Training yourself to lift 300 pounds isn’t so hard if you’ve already lifted 290. Similarly, speaking in front of an audience of 1000 people isn’t so tough once you’ve already spoken to 900.

So grab a piece of paper, and write down one of your fears that you’d like to overcome. Then number from one to ten, and write out ten variations of this fear, with number one being the least anxiety-producing and number ten being the most anxiety-producing. This is your fear hierarchy. For example, if you’re afraid of asking someone out on a date, then number one on your list might be going out to a public place and smiling at someone you find attractive (very mild fear). Number two might be smiling at ten attractive strangers in a single day. Number ten might be asking out your ideal date in front of all your mutual friends, when you’re almost certain you’ll be turned down flat and everyone in the room will laugh (extreme fear). Now start by setting a goal to complete number one on your list. Once you’ve had that success (and success in this case simply means taking action, regardless of the outcome), then move on to number two, and so on, until you’re ready to tackle number ten or you just don’t feel the fear is limiting you anymore. You may need to adjust the items on your list to make them practical for you to actually experience. And if you ever feel the next step is too big, then break it down into additional gradients. If you can lift 290 pounds but not 300, then try 295 or even 291. Take this process as gradually as you need to, such that the next step is a mild challenge for you but one you feel fairly confident you can complete. And feel free to repeat a past step multiple times if you find it helpful to prepare you for the next step. Pace yourself.

By following this progressive training process, you’ll accomplish two things. You’ll cease reinforcing the fear/avoidance response that you exhibited in the past. And you’ll condition yourself to act more courageously in future situations. So your feelings of fear will diminish at the same time that your expression of courage grows. Neurologically you’ll be weakening the limbic control over your actions while strengthening the neocortical control, gradually moving from unconscious mouse-like to conscious human-like behavior.

The second approach to building courage is to acquire additional knowledge and skill within the domain of your fear. Confronting fears head-on can be helpful, but if your fear is largely due to ignorance and lack of skill, then you can usually reduce or eliminate the fear with information and training. For example, if you’re afraid to quit your job and start your own business, even though you’d absolutely love to be in business for yourself, then start reading books and taking classes on how to start your own business. Spend an afternoon at your local library researching the subject, or do the research online. Join the local Chamber of Commerce and any relevant trade organizations in your field. Attend conferences. Build connections. Enlist the help of a mentor. Build your skill to the point where you start to feel confident that you could actually succeed, and this knowledge will help you act more boldly and courageously when you’re ready. This method is especially effective when a large part of your fear is due to the unknown. Often just reading a book or two on the subject will be enough to dispel the fear so that you’re able to take action.

These two methods are my personal favorites, but there are many additional ways to condition yourself to overcome fear, including neuro-linguistic programming, and self-confrontation. You can research them via an online search engine if you wish to learn such methods and increase the number of fear-busting tools in your arsenal.

The exact process you use to build courage isn’t important. What’s important is that you consciously do it. Just as your muscles will atrophy if you don’t regularly stress them, your courage will atrophy if you don’t consistently challenge yourself to face down your fears. In the absence of this kind of conscious conditioning, you’ll automatically become weak in both body and mind. If you aren’t regularly exercising your courage, then you are strengthening your fear by default; there is no middle ground. Just as your muscles automatically atrophy from lack of use, so your courage will automatically decay in the absence of conscious conditioning.

Now this may sound overly gloomy, so here’s a positive way to look at it. Heavy weights can be a physical burden, but they are helpful tools to build strong muscles. You would not look at a 45-pound dumbbell and say, “Why must you be so heavy?” It is what it is. Heaviness is your thought, not an intrinsic property of the dumbbell itself. Similarly, do not look at the things you fear and say, “Why must you be so scary?” Fear is your reaction, not a property of the object of your anxiety.

Fear is not your enemy. It is a compass pointing you to the areas where you need to grow. So when you encounter a new fear within yourself, celebrate it as an opportunity for growth, just as you would celebrate reaching a new personal best with strength training.

Catch a Glimpse of Your Own Greatness

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent to the dark place where it leads.
– Erica Jong

The highest courage is to dare to appear to be what one is.
– John Lancaster Spalding

Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

So what do you do with your newly developed courage? Where will it lead you? The answer is that it will permit you to lead a far more fulfilling, meaningful and exceptional life. You will truly begin living as a daring human being instead of a timid mouse. You will uncover and develop your greatest talents. You will begin living far more consciously and deliberately than you ever have before. Instead of reacting to events, you will proactively manufacture your own events.

Courage is something you can only truly experience alone. It is a private victory, not a public one. Summoning the courage to listen to your innermost desires is not a group activity and does not result from building a consensus with others.

Kahlil Gibran writes in The Prophet, “The vision of one man lends not its wings to another man.” The purpose of your existence is yours alone to discover. No one on earth has lived through the exact same experiences you have, and no one thinks the exact same thoughts you do.

On the one hand, this is a lonely realization. Whether you live alone or enjoy the deepest intimacy with a loving partner, deep down you must still face the reality that your life is yours alone to live. You can choose to temporarily yield control of your life to others, whether it be to a company, a spouse, or simply to the pressures of daily living, but you can never give away your personal responsibility for the results. Whether you assume direct and conscious control over your life or merely react to events as they happen to you, you and you alone must bear the consequences.

If you commit to following the path of courage, you will ultimately be forced to confront what is perhaps the greatest fear of all – that you are far more powerful and capable than you initially realized, that your ultimate potential is far greater than anything you’ve experienced in your past, and that with this power comes tremendous responsibility. You may not be able to solve all the woes of this planet, but if you ever do commit yourself 100% to the fulfillment of your true potential, you can significantly impact the lives of many people, and that impact will ripple through the future for generations to come.

What is the difference between you and one of those legendary historical figures who did have such an impact? You both had many of the same fears. You both were born with talents in some areas and weaknesses in others. The only thing stopping you is fear, and the only thing that will get you past it is courage. What you do with your life isn’t up to your parents, your boss, or your spouse. It’s up to you and you alone.

Catching a glimpse of your own greatness can be one of the most unsettling experiences imaginable. And even more disturbing is the awareness of the tremendous challenges that await you if you accept it. Living consciously is not an easy path, but it is a uniquely human experience, and it requires making the committed decision to permanently let go of that mouse within you. Going after your greatest and most ambitious dreams and experiencing failure and disappointment, running butt up against your most humbling human limitations instead of living with a comfortable padding of potential – these fears are common to us all.

The first few times you encounter such fears, you may quickly retreat back to the illusory security of life as a mouse. But if you keep exercising your courage, you will eventually mature to the point where you can openly accept the challenges and responsibilities of life as a fully conscious human being. Continuing to live as a mouse will simply hold no more interest for you. You will acknowledge within the deepest recesses of your being, I have awakened to this incredible potential within me, and I accept what that will require of me. Whatever it costs me, whatever I must sacrifice to follow this path, bring it on. I’m ready. Even though you will still experience fear, you will recognize it for the illusion it is, and you will know how to use your human courage to face it down, such that fear will no longer have the power to stop you.

As your move from fear to courage, your exceptional life will resonate with the kind of person you once dreamed when you were younger. Through this practical approach of taking 100% responsibility for your fears by courageously chosen that path of living exceptional life, every aspect of your life would taken care of as you grow stronger and better each day.

Until next time, live exceptionally!